Perfectionism, obsessive overthinking and fear-based decision making have ruled my life since I was young girl. With a mother who suffered from mental illness, I believed since age 8 that I was to be an example to and a source of safety for my little sisters. If that sort of high standard for oneself doesn’t spur anxiety, I don’t know what does.
And that’s how list making came into my life. It seems trivial, but it was the one thing I felt justified taking time to do for myself while I devoted the rest of my time to trying to live as an example to my sisters. So, I started writing lists. And unbeknownst to me, these simple exercises were actually organizing the chaos in my mind. Bullet point by bullet point, I could see a clearer version of myself—my inner thoughts, my greatest interests, desires, passions and fears.
我简单的新爱好实际上是fo创建空间r myself to seemyself, to create a visual representation of the me that existsoutsideof my family and the stresses that had clouded my vision and buried me in anxiety for so long.
And let’s be honest: Writing a list issomuch easier than journaling in full sentences.